A message to my Grandchildren…

“The afternoon knows what the morning never expected” 

                                                                                                                                                           —Robert Frost

Dear Charlie, Oliver, and Lucy,

I want you to know I love you three and your mother more than anything on earth.  It was not my choice to be absent from your lives.  I hope you will find the family writings and photographs I have uploaded on this website interesting and enlightening.   It’s all about you and how you came to be.  I hope you are all having happy lives. I would love to be part of them.   As I’ve told your mother, I will always be here for you, my door has never closed.  

You know, your papaw is queer.  My younger being knew it before I even knew what the word meant. When I was a kid, my upbringing hid things from me that I and others like me needed to know in order to understand our feelings. In my case, this deception lasted for 27 years. It still happens today to kids who begin to realize they’re queer and have no one to help them understand the feelings they have.  I grew up listening to my church, my school, my family, and a society who at the time didn’t want me to know about myself and instead tried to make me think I was someone I wasn’t. When I finally did find myself, I was suddenly free from all the self-hatred and anxiety that had clouded my thoughts for so long. 

Today, these same actions that kept me from knowing myself  are being used to ban books, label all queer people as molesters and freaks, make laws that reject people who are LGBTQ+, and teach kids to disrespect people who might be different from themselves.  These actions are often done in the name of God, but there’s no solid evidence to support the things they say. I learned to research the truth instead of letting someone tell me their version of what they think the truth is.  

I hope you’re all doing great and dreaming of someday exploring outside the beautiful East Tennessee countryside.  The world is a vast and wonderful place, full of amazing lessons and opportunities to make a difference.  I keep an eye on you and your mom as best I can.  You three are beautiful souls.  

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